Ocean

Once I was good friends with this interesting guy. We used to talk for hours and hours and it was hard. He didnt take any crap from me and he would tell me everything I wouldnt want to hear. And it would make me mad, I would kick and shout and be mean but he kept telling me the truth - That I am just a little girl, lost in her own ways and that when I am hurt I try to hurt everyone around...And because I am hurt a lot, I carry the pain into  every room I step in. It was hard listening to that, even more when I realized he was right. It was  weird and I felt like he can see through me.

But the most important thing he said to me was about relationships. He said that they are just like waves..That if you go all the way up, you will soon be all the way down. And I can see it now. And whats more. I can see that when the wave comes and you start moving up and down, it disturbs the peace. You start moving up and down faster and faster and you cant control it anymore. And then its time to get out of the water. So I did. I stepped away and I hope everything will calm itself.

But I am weak. It has not been even a day and I am sorry I did it. But the truth is - I know its not right. I know something is rotten here and I cannot fix it. On the other hand my biggest fear is, that he will tell me that I am right. Frankly, I do not know how I would survive that. I dont think I would.